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Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

Or to put it another  way……………….................

 

Dosn't Your Child Deserve Happy Parents Even If They Aren't Living In The Same Home? 

 

 

Why would anyone want to put that much pressure on their child, because that is what you are doing even if you don’t realise it.

 

Happy children come from happy homes, happy homes make happy families be they single parent families, extended families, or two parent families.  If you are staying together for the sake of the children, you are saying you are unhappy in your relationship but you will put up with the unhappiness for the sake of someone else.  Why?

 

Children who are living with parents who are unhappy learn about unhappiness.  Forget about the myths that say “children from single parent families don’t grow up to be well rounded, kind, caring, stable adults”.  I actually know of more “unkind, uncaring unstable adults” who grew up living with both parents than I do who grew up living with just one parent, why because the parents were so unhappy in their relationship that as the problems within their relationship grew the resentment of the child they saw as the one thing trapping them in the relationship also grew,  or completely the opposite occurs and they cling so tightly to the child as their only source of happiness that the child starts to feel trapped and then is in danger of resenting the parent who is doing it to them.

 

If you are unhappy in your relationship staying together for the sake of the children will not solve the problems it could make them worse.

 

Yes I understand every parent wants the best for their child, but really is staying somewhere you don’t want to be, are unhappy being, pretending to be happy really the best thing for your child.  If you are pretending to be  “happy families” rather than really being them, sooner or later the cracks will show and the person who will see them first…………… yep you’ve got it your child.  Children and very perceptive.

 

We all care for our children to the best of our ability, we give them the tools for “good living” throughout their lives, is using them as glue to bind a broken relationship really giving them the best start in life, by doing that are we in danger of teaching our children that being with someone who makes you unhappy is better than being on your own and being happy?

 

Please just think what kind of message you are going to be giving to your child before you decide to stay together for the sake of that same child, because if you are unhappy your child will be too.

Published Thursday, February 21, 2008 12:06 PM by Trinity Connection
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Comments

# re: Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

Excellent post.  I agree with you on every point and have been telling people this for a very long time.  I come from a broken home and at 15 years old I knew it was for the best.

xoxo,
Cristin
Thursday, February 21, 2008 7:39 AM by MysticWonder01

# re: Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

Dear Trinity:

Great post and so very true.  I love the new picture of you I must add!  Keep enlightening us for it is very much appreciated.

Rosie
Thursday, February 21, 2008 8:17 AM by Rosalea

# re: Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

Cristin, thank you, I think we forget sometimes that children learn by watching and listening.

Rosie thank you, I try my best to challenge some ways of thinking.  As for the picture thought it was about time I put up a more recent picture of me.
Thursday, February 21, 2008 9:01 AM by Trinity Connection

# re: Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

I was reared in a loving, two parent home...I always wanted or thought that my children would be reared the same.  Well, life gave me a reality check and I must say, I've done one helluva job rearing my children.  My Brothers and Brothers in law have always taken up the slack for the slacker who chose not to be a Father...shame on him because he will NEVER know how wonderful these human beings truly are. All of my children are well adjusted, capable, initelligent creatures whom I adore and Thank God everday for...
It's great when your children often say, I never needed a Father because Mom is everything!  
And you, my dear friend are a shining example of how wonderful your child turns out when you take that leap and rear a child in a loving, stable, warm, caring home that you have provided...her success is yours!   GOOD JOB, MUM!
Loves ya!
Cheryl

Thursday, February 21, 2008 2:28 PM by Capricorn 1

# re: Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

Hey girl right back attcha. What matters is that the home and the people within the home are happy and caring towards each other not that there is a mother and father in the home. My daughter always loved the fact she has two bedrooms, and when she was little the fact she had two birthdays, two christmases, and because her father and I didn't spend everyday with each other when we did spend time together for our daughter's sake it was always pleasant.  
Thursday, February 21, 2008 2:46 PM by Trinity Connection

# re: Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

Hey Trinity!
I agree with you on the home situation. My mother brought up four children with very little input from my father (he was an absentee parent). I feel I was blessed to have grown up in that environment rather than the alternative. Had my7 parents stayed together it would have been a misery and hell!
And kudos on the new picture!
Love ya
Caliope123
Friday, February 22, 2008 1:27 AM by caliope123

# re: Is Staying Together For The Sake Of A Child Really The Best Thing?

I hear ya Caliope, my parents did stay together and it was hell and screwed us kids up pretty good too.  Thanks re the pic I love my new fun hair style.  I promise I'll put the paperbag back on next month  hehe
Friday, February 22, 2008 1:44 AM by Trinity Connection

# Your Horoscope for Monday February 25, 2008

Queen of Cups18 writes about the Strength Tarot Card.
Trinity Connection writes "Staying Together for...
Wednesday, February 27, 2008 11:21 AM by Daily Astrologer
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